Here’s an article extraordinary for its lack of self-knowledge. The first half contains a degree of sneering against ordinary Leavers that even the Guardian might consider a bit over the top:

Parliament Square was a knuckle-dragging carnival of irredeemable stupidity


What makes Britain’s independence day different from those that have gone before it that its prize is a freedom nobody else wants


There they were, all gathered in one place. Not quite midnight’s children but 11 o’clock’s toddlers. Here, at the long-awaited end of dry January, was a once-proud nation coming together to wet its little trousers.

A few commentators have already critiqued this, including Dellers. But what really grabbed me was that after sticking the boot into Britain’s own ‘basket of deplorables’ in the first half of the article, in the second half the author complains about the divide in Britain:

Brexit’s ultimate tragedy is that it has broken the very thing it imagines itself to have restored: national identity, national cohesion. There is none at all. There are just two huge tribes set against each other, and the mutual loathing is as fierce as ever.


There simply isn’t any middle ground. The gulf is as wide as it has ever been: one side revels in regaining its imagined independence, while the other mourns the terrible loss of having been part of something big, something ambitious, with its eyes fixed on the future and not drunk on the imagined glories of the past.

So let me summarise this article:

(1) One half of the country is extremely stupid and vile and those people should not be allowed to have any say in things because they are foolish and ignorant and really they should all be in jail.

(2) How awful it is that we have such a terrible divide in this country.


But even (1) and (2) don’t quite capture it, because the author is blaming the Brexiteers for the divide:

The prime minister urges healing – but he is the disease, not the cure.

So we must add:

(3) The divide is all the fault of the thick Leavers who were allowed to meddle in things beyond their comprehension. Not us virtuous and brilliant Remainers.

But you virtuous and brilliant Remainers still want to heal the divide, right?

There is simply no way anyone of good conscience can make peace with being so very clearly on the wrong side of history.


Come together? Sorry, but no thanks.

It appears not. Instead we have

(4) The divide will remain until the Remainers crush the Leavers and reverse Brexit.

Got it, thanks.

As it’s the Independent, which is so hopeless that it regularly publishes fake articles concocted by Andrew Doyle, I wondered whether this was also a fake. But it’s written by the Indy’s own political sketch writer, Tom Peck, who is, you would surmise from the way he carries on, an Olympian god.


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2 thoughts on “Peckerhead

  1. The Indiepants lost its way some time around the early 90s.

    These days, its main function seems to be to make the Graun look good by comparison.

  2. The author must be very bitter and twisted inside to loathe half of the British public so much. Brexit Derangement Syndrome must be true. I had a few celebratory drinks with friends and relatives last Friday. I suppose this makes him hate me too. But I can count on only a few fingers of one hand the number of remain voters I know. Almost everyone I know and all my family voted Leave. Most people do not live in the metropolitan London bubble.

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